The Future Is Now (Or Now Was The Future At All Points On The Timeline Prior To Now)

I'm feeling very overwhelmed by the future right now. It's almost enough to make me not able to function at all.

Luckily I have all this stuff to do tomorrow, so my mind has things to take up space this ink-spill of despair might otherwise seep into.

Sometimes I'm very haunted by the fact I was in the back of an ambulance one day and I came to terms with what seemed at the time to be my imminent death. I'm haunted because it was such a calming feeling, unlike anything I'd felt up to that point, and I have such a hard time coming close to that feeling now.

We're all just so very alone, and it sucks to realize it, I suppose.

In other news, I will be getting up in about 6 hours and 10 minutes to do some walking. I'm hoping to spend most of that time sleeping--and maybe hitting the emotional reset button. Wish me luck!

(How odd is it I can feel this negative and still think, "But I need to be sure to get up and walk in the morning..."? What's that about? Freak.)