Thursday, January 07, 2010

My Epiphany: It's All About Natural Consequences, Baby

Appropriately enough, today I had an epiphany, of sorts...

Over the past 30-odd hours, I've been thinking a lot about Brad and reading about his life after 1985, and reading very funny things he wrote and all of the amazing things he was a part of... and I realized while I'll never not feel awful about the way things went with us, I don't need any more punishment than the natural consequences: I didn't get to be his friend. I'll always have this Brad-shaped hole in my life (I was just commenting on someone's blog today how I often think of Brad when I read something he would have liked or see something he might have laughed about or gotten intrigued by), and it was of my own making. On the other hand, I'm sure Brad picked himself up, dusted himself off, and moved on ages ago. "So enough with the agonizing over what happened 25 years ago," I told myself.

So I hope I get to attend some part of the funeral arrangements, although I've not heard anything more about them at this time. I'm also hoping the weather will cooperate at least a little bit...

Speaking of weather--no school for the rest of the week. Strange. I don't know all the down-and-dirty reasons why it's called. I see people on facebook talking about what they've heard or what they think about it, but from my point of view I think it's not a bad thing--and I don't mean because I don't have to go to work. We have lots of kids who either don't have the sense or don't have the budget (or both) to dress warmly. We have lots of kids who are seeing themselves off to school in the morning. We have a lot of kids in both categories who ride a bus to school. I'd rather not have ANY kid standing out in that cold--properly dressed or not (but especially the not).

I hope each of you in the snowy parts of the world is staying warm, driving safely, and being the best person you know how to be. Actually, I'll go ahead and wish that last one for all of you.

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